Current mood:	surprised
Current music:	Epica - Sensorium

Lingual homicide waitin' to happen
Yeah, so apparently I've officially become that person, who never writes in his LJ anymore, and only does so to point out how long it's been. So I'm going to go ahead and pretend I never left or anything.

Now, here's what's worrying me right now: I just put in a good block of overtime with my boss and the boss of my boss of my boss. Just the three of us, staying late. And I was coming home after all that in the hot hot sun, and as I was turning on to my home street, I sniffed, and realized that I was pretty sweaty, and that I really did smell like sweat.

Complication: It didn't smell like my sweat.

See, I know what my sweat smells like, and that ain't it. It's definitely man-sweat, but for goodness's sake, I am not the homogay. I don't know what was going on there. I was sweating somebody else's sweat.

Enough of that disgustingness. On to the pope.


Yes, the pope! Ol' Joe "Ben" Ratzinger. Yes, the Evil Pope. The one in Nazi Boy Scouts. The one I predicted would be flying around in his popejet gunning people down with a tommy gun. He, uh...well. He shut me up good. I have few words. I remember giving amnesty to Disturbed for covering Genesis's "Land of Confusion" (not to be confused with giving them amnesty for their cover of the song...just for the fact that it was covered; I now avoid acknowledging the band, the cover, and the general demographics of the fan base, as a courtesy to show that they're back at square one with me), but this goes a little beyond. I think this pope actually won me over. No, wait, I'm sure of it. I know, he might just be bowing to the cardinals and their influence because they're under so much pressure, but there are so many other things to fix before they build up the kehonies to go on record with this little gem. This was one hell of a bold step, and it's something I've been saying all along, so more power to Benny 16.

So that this entry can survive the ages after that link dies, lemme remind future-me what I'm talking about in an LJ cut.

POPE Benedict has said there is substantial scientific proof of the theory of evolution.

The Pope, speaking as he was concluding his holiday in northern Italy, also said the human race must listen to "the voice of the Earth" or risk destroying its very existence.

In a talk with 400 priests, the Pope spoke of the current debate raging in some countries, particularly the US and his native Germany, between creationism and evolution. 

“They are presented as alternatives that exclude each other,” the Pope said.

“This clash is an absurdity because on one hand there is much scientific proof in favour of evolution, which appears as a reality that we must see and which enriches our understanding of life and being as such.”

There you have it. The pope's also a hippy in a big hat and occasionally visits the woods.


Certain things have been bothering me lately. I will share them with you. (On LJ, we know this as "listen to me bitch about stuff")

Okay, look, people. If you hear a word, make sure you fully understand its context before you adopt it. A beeline is not a straight line. It's not a line people make when there's a clear path to what they want. Just look at the word, is all I'm asking. Bee. Line. Lines made by bees are not straight. They wiggle, they waggle, they dance, and use this dance to talk to other bees. If they've landed, they're either looking all over for honey-making supplies, or in the hive, at work. (And of course, I mean female bees who are not the queen, because the queen just makes babies, and the males do nothing but beat the shit out of each other for their chance to break their little bee-penis off in the queen and die from blood loss...true story, read up on the tragic lives of bees.) People don't try to make sense of language before they fuck with it.

Which brings me to fecund. Who is walking this earth right now, or wheelchairing over it, who didn't see this word and immediately think it meant "shitty"? Feces. Shit. Fecund. Of shit. Sure, there's fecal, which also means "of shit," but many words have two or more ways to say them. Like fertile, which has a great many synonyms. It really pains my mind and my soul to know that somebody saw the word, wondered what the fuck it meant, looked it up, and said "Oh, wait, it doesn't refer to shit it all, it means fertile," and began using it in conversation. Let me go ahead and clue you in, this is a CLEAR AND OBVIOUS CASE that you are trying WAY too hard to sound articulate. If you can't find a better, less-shit-implying word than fecund to express the ability to bear children, then you really do need to start thinking that maybe you're that tool who everybody laughs at.

Shall I continue? 'fraid I'm gonna.

People get excited about stupid things. Advertisers know this. This is why you will hear things like "You can get a new Ford Escort for as low as eleven nine ninety nine, ninety ninety nine five five ninety nine ninety fivety ninety five." See, most people would think I'm bitching about how gullible people are in thinking that all those nines keep the price from being a horrible, staggering twelve grand, when really it's just the modest and reasonable eleven grand, nine hundred ninety-nine dollars and ninety-nine cents. "Wait, I think I found some change in my couch, suddenly we can afford to buy the car!" No. I'm not on that right now. It's the "as low as" part.

As low as. Meaning....IS. You can get a Ford Escort for eleven ninetyblah. Adding "As low as" just makes people retarded for thinking it means anything. When you're talking about money, As low as = is. As high as = is. As high as, IS THAT HEIGHT.

Oh, here's a good one. "Delivery will take a maximum of four to six weeks." Okay, if you've ever said something like this and meant it, I'm not apologizing for calling you a fucking idiot. Shipping will take a maximum of six weeks, now swallow, wipe your mouth, collect your twenty, and get back on the streets looking for another junkie who just got paid, because you're a mindless corporate whore.


That being said, my life is good right now. I'm full of peace. Those of you who need to know my relationship status, do. Those who need to know my job status...I'm making good money. Those of you who need to know my living situation...it's entertaining to watch these monkeys fight, and my AC is frickin' awesome. Car's not doing so well, but I'm in a position to buy another one if I feel I should, and not bottom myself out.

I'm well over a hundred pages for the sequel of m'book. Jess still doesn't sound close to being done with it (because its power RUINED HER LIFE, BEWARE!), so I ordered a new one, and as soon as John's done with it, it goes to TheMitri, whose address I do have. I have three copies in existence, and thus far nobody's been shit for feedback, but what can y'do? I was really hoping to have feedback on the direction I took the story before I actually got started on the sequel, but after more than a year, I was kind of out of options.

This is already too long.

One more thing: Epica owns you all.

Word up to my niggas, my wiggas, and my flesh-eating chiggas.


[EDIT] Whoops! What would this entry be without a youtube link? HE RETURNETH. Bear with it.